Wanna Be Cook

Bad Mom Bark Bites

I posted the picture for my recipe on my Facebook Page, FFM.img_4797

I asked if anyone was interested in this unhealthy, candy drawer emptying, sending-it-to-work-with-your-significant-other, and yummingness? (Yes. I meant Yummingness. It’s all about Parallel Structure!) Well, I got no bites. Nobody wanted to bite, literally. Members were afraid of having candy in the house. They missed the point. This recipe is intended to get RID of the candy in the house. Every recipe has its story. Here is mine!

My husband and I are in the process of decluttering our home. Almost ten years, two kids, we have stuff!

Two things about stuff and me: I like to toss things. I hate wasting food.

Also, I love to decorate. However, once a holiday is over, I am done with the holiday. It’s December and we still had candy in my daughter’s trick-or-treating pumpkin. I opened the “treat” cabinet to see if I could put the candy away and put the pumpkin in its proper bin. The cabinet was a mess. It was the perfect old candy storm.

I got the idea for The Bad Mom Bark Bites from various DIY sites: perfect, pretty, breakable bark. That’s not the case here.


  1. Two Hershey Bars from a trip to Hershey Park-almost two years ago
  2. Christmas themed Reese’s Pieces Peanut Butter Cups- from last
  3. Christmas
  4. Holiday Themed Kisses- from last Hanukah
  5. Pretzels from my daughter’s birthday-last August
  6. Halloween M&M’s and Candy Corn- unopened candy from Halloween-2016

First, I put the Hershey bars, Kisses, and Reese’s in a bowl.  melted them in the microwave. I then spread the chocolate on parchment paper, in a disposable tin.


I had so many treats that I mixed the melted chocolate and candy together, and topped it with another layer of candy.

Mega Bark!


I put it in the fridge for a few hours. The final product was so thick! Nothing was getting through it, so I picked it up and dropped it on the counter  a few times.Yes, on the parchment paper. My husband is reading this and shaking his head.  I didn’t go that crazy, Honey! My daughter found this to be very funny. I did too! But,  I got some nice sized pieces. The pieces that fell off are Mini Bad Mom Bark Bites.



The Final Product!


The best part was getting rid of stuff.


My husband will take it to work and done!

As you can see, I don’t cook pretty. This was a creative, fun way to get some excess out of my house. The Tasty, Pinterest, and Health Code people may disagree. Whatever. It’s 5:00 pm somewhere..So.. Just Kidding. Laundry to do. People to feed and clean. It’s nice to be a rebel for a little while.



2 thoughts on “Bad Mom Bark Bites

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