A To Z Challenge 2016

High School

Michelle

High School. My twentieth high school reunion is approaching. Sarcastic “Yea”! That’s my feeling towards high school.  Do I have friends from high school? Sure. However, they are not my “high school” friends. They are my friends. Do I reminisce with them about the past? No. There is hardly enough time to talk about our daily lives when we get together. Right as we get to a juicy topic, we are interrupted by a child or husband. By the time we get back to our conversation we forget what we were talking about, and  we start talking about something else.  Before we circle back to our original conversation, our time ends because we need to get back to our husbands and family. The lives we chose. The lives we enjoy. The past is a broken whisper. Our deafening laughter about our brutally honest testimonies as wives and mothers is what bonds us today.

I don’t even recognize the person I was in high school. I also do not have fond, endearing memories with many of my classmates. Is that rational or fair of me? No. I know I am not the only one who has matured. Do I have a distorted perception of the past? Probably.

I have no interest in schlepping myself back in time to prove how I have changed. I don’t have the energy to see how others have changed. I am happy with my present life, with my present trials and tribulations. I have no desire to stir the pot of the past.

Some may say I am hiding from the past. Maybe I am. I am happy to hide in the splendor of my present.

Am I missing out? Let me know. I would love to know your thoughts.

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“H” Draft

23 thoughts on “High School”

  1. Might be good to go along without any expectations for the evening? Go together with with one or two of your high school friends that you still see and that way, it’s not a wasted evening! As a minimum, you’ll get the chance to see them sans husbands/kids for a quieter catch up. I was uncertain about attending my 20th reunion (child number three was only six weeks old at the time) but went with my best friend from school and was pleasantly surprised. Everyone got along, no competitive life comparisons and my BF and I had a good giggle on the walk home. Great post!

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  3. Interesting topic! This dynamic plays out in our house. My husband and I are high school sweethearts (I’ll pause for the reaction: either AAWWWHHH or UUGGHH). He still has close relationships with several of his friends from high school, many of whom he grew up with. I am the exact opposite. The only person I still consider a friend graduated two years before us. She and I attended the same college, and this is where we really became friends.

    I honestly don’t feel like I am missing anything. My husband and I attended reunions and my high school friends are there. We laugh, reminiscence, and promise to keep in touch, which really means we exchange Christmas cards. But that’s the extent of it. By nature, I am not a social and outgoing person so the occasional five to ten year meet-up works just fine for me. In contrast, my husband and his buddies are part of one another’s lives. I guess it works for both us.

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    1. I think it’s wonderful you married your high school sweetheart. I am very much like you. I am not very social. I am and I’m not. Does that make sense? I love who I love but I don’t love my high school past. I think sweats and wine are on my roster for that night.

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      1. I can totally relate! You are selective about and loyal to who and what you invest your time and energy in. High school does not rate.
        Wine and sweats are never a bad idea, IMHO 😉

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  4. You’re an introvert, aren’t you? Sure we can socialize, though our default energy-conserving position is not to. At least among large numbers of people we don’t feel any particular connection to. Like a reunion with people we might not even have thought about in 20 years.

    You don’t have to go. You don’t need an excuse. You don’t need permission. Those who go might not even notice you aren’t there. And if a few of them do, they might ask, “Whatever happened to Brook?” But if you’ve gotten along without them so far, and you’re happy with the friendships you’ve maintained to the present, take the lead from your baby girl.

    Let it go.

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  5. I think it also depends on the type of experience you had in high school. If the memories were sad or depressing, then I don’t think you are wrong to leave them in past.

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  6. I would never attend my high school reunion if there ever is one. I have zero contact with people from my time there and I have changed so much, as I know we all have. I think I would prefer staying in the present for this one too.:-)

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  7. I went to mine three years ago and had a blast. I couldn’t believe how many people that I hadn’t seen since college (most of them went locally) or high school. I had so much fun. It wasn’t depressing or a trip down memory lane with losers. You should go. It will most likely be fun.

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  8. I’ve been to all but one of my school reunions despite having an awful time at school. I went to an all girls’ school renowned for bullying. However, the reunions have been great. The bullies largely stayed away and people have mellowed out. People have been accepting of each other. I went to my 10 year reunion 2 weeks after having brain surgery and had hair missing discreetly on one side of my head but people had their own scenarios and I made some new friends. Most of my school friends have been lousy at keeping in touch but are are a few I’ve established close contact with in recent years. I see the school group as being like family in that they come and go out of your life and have more or less in common depending on what’s going on.
    Hope that makes sense. There are a lot of distractions xx Rowena

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    1. It makes perfect sense. We experience many things, which help us mellow and grow kinder. I think it’s great you reconnected with some friends. It is frustrating when people do not keep in touch. It requires work from both parties.

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      1. I am quite extroverted and quite a few of my school friends are more introverted and don’t need that people contact in quite the same way. I try a few times and then leave it to Facebook comments, annual email or the reunions. No point flogging a dead horse either.

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